《简爱》电影观后感

“纯爱”、“女权主义”、”小清新”,是三个我绝对不会用来形容这个故事的词。

简爱作为一个19岁最左右生活在英国古板的维多利亚时代的少女,能够如此清晰地认识自己是谁,想要什么,与社会的关系,与男人的关系,真是一个令人惊诧的事情。在所谓开放和进步的现代社会,也很难遇到一个这样的女孩。不仅这和开放与进步没有关系,开放和进步恰恰给女孩子无从下手找到自己的机会,开放和进步恰恰给真正的禁锢披上堂而皇之的外套。

我还没有读过原著,也从来没有看过任何版本的电影,连故事都从未听过。但现在已迫不及待地去翻开它了。我现在想写下的,也仅仅是我从电影里得到的故事梗概引发的感想。

关于女权

我真正欣赏的是女人用她们独有的柔和的力量去与世间一切不平去抗衡。如果灵魂是没有性别的,简爱一样的女子从出生就一直拥有这样没有性别的灵魂。由此而言,去“抗衡”也许都是偏激的语言,因为她们天生不认为有什么性别上的不公平存在去被打破和抗衡的需要。真正需要去抗衡的女人是有着女性灵魂的人,她们才要努力地去打破被歧视的枷锁。简爱只是在做自己,这样的灵魂的默认价值就是平等自由,所以自始至终她们只是简单地去做自己。女演员的这种生硬和古板非常应景。简爱这种天生的简单真是一种幸运。

关于纯爱

性是美好的。但与爱一样,只有很少很少的人才真正经历过最美好的性。最美好的性从来与高潮迭起与否没有关系,大部分人之所以停留在以高潮去判别好坏的程度,是因为他们从不相信这么美好的爱情存在。那么真正美好的性是什么?性在我眼里大多数组成部分是自己对自己的态度。在与他人的性爱过程中,大部分是自己与自己的灵魂纠缠。真正美好的性之所以美好和少有,是因为它建立在双方必须忘我的前提下,那么也就是说在性爱的过程中是自己的灵魂被释放出来,而不再与自己的灵魂纠缠。要达到性爱中的忘我,需要两颗心最真挚地相爱。两颗心在没有性的染色下,才可以最自由地去交谈, 而在确认这最真挚最热烈的情感下,性爱的美好才能够真正被体验。”纯爱”不是什么高度,它只是最美好的爱情的一个重要决定条件。

小清新

我对其他典型的小清新作品不了解,所以不能妄下定论。但是我想说这部作品充斥着浓重的浪漫主义色彩 – 这里的“浪漫”不是仅仅指风花雪月你侬我侬,而是指起源于德国的浪漫主义文学作品,主人公无尽地在理想主义追求中的自我折磨和大胆的奇幻想象。个人认为这和小清新完全背道而驰。

简爱为什么会选择Rochester?是因为他不仅懂和欣赏她没有性别的灵魂,而且还有那个时代男人极少有的(是否该说是根本不存在的,毕竟小说是虚幻的)勇气去选择与她这样的灵魂在一起生活。虽然我们现在的社会标榜自己的进步和开放,可是我认为这样的男人在现在也十分少有。女人,遇到这样的男人便是美好,没遇到我们便继续做那作为一个human being该做的事情。

虽然安娜依斯宁在我眼里是一个女人的灵魂,但我想以她的一段话作为结尾:
I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.

Woman of mystery

Men like to complain about women being too emotional, too complicated, too hard to understand. I complain about women the same, so I complain about myself as such, too.

Anais Nin talks about being a woman, a mother – a mother who gives life not to children of the earth, but a mother who gives life to the men who are artists. And of course, being an artist is being somewhere ever so close to God, the Creator.

Orgasm.

Have you ever wondered why women orgasm? Unlike men, it does not serve any functional purpose for women. There are quite a number of women who never experienced orgasm in their entire lives. And even for the same woman who is capable of reaching orgasm, she may find orgasm an entirely whimsical fairy.

Oh but when it comes, it consumes you from the depth of your soul, gushing your tears out, breaths short, eyes shut.

Yes. Ecstasy. Ecstasy, the utter beatitude, and tears. (Have you ever wondered why tragedy is placed on a higher ground than comedy?)

When a woman reaches that ecstatic moment, the equivalent of male orgasmic functionality is achieved – to give life to the Stimmung, 洪荒,where artists springs to life, where one is closest to God.

It takes a lifetime for the woman to unveil this mystery about herself, and it takes much more for a man to unveil this mystery with her, and for her. If you are a woman, consider it a great privilege to be a woman of mystery; and if you are a man, oh… when you meet the woman for you, what great mystery stands before you to unveil…..

 

Hello 2017

I woke up to this old photograph (photographer unknown), and I cannot help but to beam.

I realized that I’ve forgotten how to fully expand my soul in each moment of happiness. They say realization is the first step to improvement, well, here’s to a year of putting the heart into everything  – and I mean, everything – that I choose to do, and letting the soul fulfill each moment.

Questions: dependence, women, artist, etc

I’m picking up writing again. Because: I realized I am (whether or not consciously) attracted to a stream-of-conscious style of writing (Henry Miller, Montaigne, Anais Nin’s diary even), and that more important than the product of writing itself, is the self-discovery during the process of writing ( as Kafka puts it: “It is, in fact, an intercourse with ghosts, and not only with the ghost of the recipient but also with one’s own ghost which develops between the lines of the letter one is writing and even more so in a series of letters where one letter corroborates the other and can refer to it as a witness.”). So it is my hope here, then, to keep writing as much as I can manage in order to keep my brain deft and well.

Two questions stemming from the same vein caught my attention lately. One (first asked by a friend of mine who happens to be a highly accomplished, serious, classical musician): if making money and achieving that desirable state of living is easy, would an artist still strive to work hard still?

As I’m typing this it seems a rather silly and self-evident question. If an artist forfeits his/her artistic effort due to easily accessible material comfort, it is obvious he/she is not a true artist. Why? Because the goal isn’t for art. But in my friend’s case, as much as I know about him, he certainly is a serious and dedicated musician. Perhaps the answer is this: for an artistic mind (or otherwise; as I believe it is true for the majority of us), materialist accumulation has no end. And therefore such unquenched desire for material gain and living comfort will always propel such people like him to strive for a higher ground artistically.

Second question is, for a woman who can easily obtain such materialistic comfort by means of men, would she still strive for self-fulfillment as an independent human being? I am a woman and I have no desire whatsoever to achieve a comfortable living through men – in fact, I tend to possess strong self-loathing feelings if I were ever close to that. So I can’t really answer this question. Maybe I will another time.

A slightly related thought: I think the sexual freedom women achieved through feminist movements is as much about choosing to have sex outside of a marital status with only the married partner as it is about choosing not to perform sexual act as a duty to her married partner within a marriage.

Ample make this bed

There are many ways to categorize people (“categorize” people, of course each person is an individual; but please bear with me for the sake of this topic). One way is to separate people into these two kinds: one who have led an innocent life, a life without the kiss of death; and the other, who have made choices so burdensome and gruesome, that the only way to continue living is through atonement. If one is strong enough and lucky enough, one will live through a metamorphosis after paying off the debts.

It is in such debts that we feel most closely bound to each other. We come to understand each other. Kinship. Humanity.

If you are debt free,  I pray the kiss of death will never be near. In an age of social media prevalence, I hope your display of happiness truly stems from the happiness of life.

I chose not to live lightly nor frivolously. Make this bed with awe.

Ample make this bed.
Make this bed with awe;
In it wait till judgment break
Excellent and fair.

Be its mattress straight,
Be its pillow round;
Let no sunrise’ yellow noise
Interrupt this ground.

– Emily Dickinson